Same Beginning, Different Ending. =)

Dream as if you'll live forever, Live as if you'll die today.

Emo alert. 


I dont know why im doing this. If you're in a foul mood please click the x at the top right hand corner of your screen.

I guess I shouldn't be emo-ing... most of y'all would probably think im doing this cuz I want attention.

Y'know what- maybe you're right. 


I should've just... I hate myself. 
Desperado, eh? I feel like a film star creating stupid rumours about herself for publicity. 
Desperate for attention. Pretense of not caring.
I'm not sad. I'm not happy.
I feel like crying. I don't wanna cry.
I want them to know that I'm fragile too.
I don't want them to say I'm weak.
I hate it when they insult me.
I like it when they actually notice me.
I hate it when they treat me as a guy.
I like the feeling of having so many friends.
So many, yet so few. 

I should be happy. I don't have relationship problems like the others.
I should appreciate my life. I can't emo like everyone else.
I should think about other stuff. I need more distractions.
I should feel proud because my parents think so highly of me.
I should do everything they want me to, and not do everything they don't.
I should listen to their advice, if I'm wrong, I have no one to blame but myself.
I should achieve to their expectations. I have no one to blame but myself. 
Scold me. Yell at me. Whack me. Do whatever you want. 
I disappointed them. 
Like what HE said, I'm useless.
I'm a bad person. I can't even take care of my sister.
I should not hate him. The truth always hurt.
But it didn't hurt me this bad before.
I am selfish.                                 I am dumb.                                              I am easily influenced.
I am emotional.       I am... SO NOT FINE. 

But then again, I have no one to blame but myself. 

Forget what I said. It doesn't matter. I don't really open the cbox now. 
What a chicken. Coward. I would have spit those words to myself earlier. 
I didn't dare. Living in the fear of disappointing people. 
I feel like a saint. I'm lying. I'm not a good person. 
HE would probably know. 

Don't ask me ANYTHING about this post.