Tuning into : The Fear - Lily Allen

Don't read this, it's boring.

Just wanted to blog it out and feel better.

I wish I could tell the world how I really really felt, deep down.

I wish I could be irresponsible and just not care about what I am doing.

I wish I could use my free time to do what I really like and want.

I wish I could be selfish.

I wish I could tell certain people that I just can't do it.

I wish I could speak up and say "No, I don't want to do you a favour"

I wish I could scold people that disagree with me.

I wish I could not care about everything, and just live.

I wish I could block out all insults and harsh words spat by people.

I wish I could be lazy and not get nagged about it.

I wish I could live without the mask that slowly became a part of me.

I wish I was stronger, spiritually and emotionally.

I wish I was more courageous, to live the way I want to.

I wish I was smarter, because it hurts when other people point it out to you.

I wish I was braver, and really show some idiots how they made me feel.

I wish I was more controlled, then I won't be posting this.

I wish I had 48 hours in a day.

I wish I had vampire powers.

I wish I had some kind of talent.

I wish I had someone to take care of me.

I wish I could stop thinking about how others will react in whatever I do, and be afraid of it.

I wish I could quit.

I wish I could just tell someone that I think living my life is hard enough, I dont have to hear how tough yours has been.

I wish I could be myself-

because the friends that mind wont matter, but the friends that matter won't mind.

But one thing I would never wish for- more love.

Because I have enough from the people around me.

"Be content", I always tell others.

"Be yourself, and love yourself for it."

I thank God for His mercy, that forgives me no matter how big a sin I commited.

I thank God for my family, that never, ever fails me.

I thank God for good friends, good influence, and very, very good sisters and brothers.

I thank God for giving me education.

I thank God for sending the angels to help me through difficult times.

I thank God for the people that care about me.

I thank God for peace in Malaysia.

I thank God for health- mine and my loved ones.

So many requests, so little to thank for. It makes us ponder, what kind of people are we, really?

Why are we never contented?

Just another philosophical-slash-ranting-slash-cheering up moment of mine.

Don't mind me. =)